Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Keeping the Faith

In my attempts to keep the faith, I feel like I have to write out loud. Glancing at the Dallas skyline at sunset moves me to do so, see above.

It's been a long month, this January 2011. It's not like me to feel "not myself", at least not for long, or to not be able to organize my thoughts within a 30 minute timeframe.

I've been thinking lately about how much time really does fly by. The company I work for has been doing reduction in forces (RIF) for the last 6 years or so, becoming pretty aggressive over the last three years. I refuse to start worrying every time we get the announcement that yet another RIF is on the horizon. What is worry going to do for me? Absolutely nothing. It's a total waste of time, and that's a pet peeve of mine. I don't like wasting time and energy on things that don't deserve it. So, I, like my team members, wait. We keep working, pretty hard actually. But all the while, we wait. At some point this RIF will affect each one of us.

I'm sick of cancer coming into my family. There, I said it. I actually complained. I won't dwell, I've posted about this more than once. I just wanted to say it out loud one more time so cancer and I are clear. I don't LIKE YOU. And I want you to disappear forever. I want the powers-that-be to find a cure for you so you will evaporate into the abyss.

I still want to get rid of at least 30% more of my "things". I haven't had much time to organize, what I normally do in January, after the Christmas decorations are taken down and stored away for next year. My mom came for a very long visit, she leaves for Florida at the end of the month. I'm out of my routine at the moment, and that's okay. I know the time will come when she won't be able to drive halfway across the country to visit my sisters and I. I am relishing the time with her. But I have to admit that I need that routine back so I can get organized and do some down-sizing. I'm not crazy in that I will give all of my stuff away, I do need some of it obviously. But the extras that sit on a closet shelf that have no sentimental value? Yeah, they're going.

I don't like to wish time away, or live in the past either. But two things are on my mind of late. The trip I was fortunate enough to take, to Paris, in September of 2009. And the trip I'm looking forward to in October of 2011, an 8 day cruise through the Cayman Islands, etc. Oh Paris. I swear I can still smell you, and I will visit again one day. I really miss you.
I want to enjoy every.month.of.2011. I really do. But I have to be honest and admit that I'm longing for October just a little. Probably because we're having some chilly weather here, without snow so I'm not enjoying it as much as I would be, if there was a snowman right outside my bedroom window that I had just built. I don't mind winter or cold air, frost on the windows, etc. But I feel like I can't get warm lately! And that's WITH a fireplace. If I think about August, and that extreme Dallas heat that I don't care for, all of this whining goes away. I don't mean to whine. I just want some beautiful snow =)

So, I'm keeping the faith. I won't be affected by the RIF until I absolutely have to be. When that happens, I will find something that fits me so well I will have no choice but to jump aboard, and start a new work journey. Change is good, my reminder.
Cancer will have a cure one day. I'm leaving it at that.
My closet and apartment will be so organized by Valentines Day that I will be amazed.
Dallas WILL get snow before Winter 2011 ends.

And finally, I will be on my first cruise, with great friends, during my most favorite month of the year. October. Until then, 2011, I will lick your face I will enjoy you so much.

Try and stop me.

See you soon friend,

PS This Saturday brings a waffle brunch at Tiffanys. You DO like waffles, don't you?


Serenity said...

Well, these are lovely, familiar musings. I think about NYC sometimes - how glad I am to have been there once, how determined I am to visit again and again. I'm quite into getting rid of things myself, though as you can imagine I'm not doing much of that lately. Still, simplicity - I'm into it. And ooh la la! A cruise in your favorite month. Now that's a lovely thought.

Tiffany said...

Simplicity has been my favorite word lately. And PLEASE take me with you when you visit Manhattan again! I would love to meet your people in their offices. Just sayin.