Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Live life out loud!

To thine own self be true


My mom gave me this advice a long time ago, and years later I've found myself giving her that same advice. It's funny to see the shift in life, our parents teach us, and then we teach them. Rather cool.

I read a tweet the other day about a friend saying that his friends are always saying to him, get married, have kids, do the responsible thing. If I had caught it real time I would have just tweeted a response, but of as usual I was very late in the game. Oh twitter, I don't mean to forsake you. I actually love you, you are probably my favorite social media outlet. So easy and quick,  and gone are the fluff posts of anything-no-one-wants-to-hear or pictures of things-we-dont-want-to-see. Wellll maybe pictures we don't want to see, but I digress.....

So here's some of what my mom said to me, and what I now say to my friend and anyone else pondering this sort of thing:

First, your life is your own and I think you have the whole living it well, downpat. I think your friends say these things out of concern and love. Don't you? They equate happiness to the American dream. Two-car garage, two point five kids, white picket fence around the house.....you get my point. They want you to be "happy", and by their definition, that is where one finds the happy. I won't discount that these things, if you're with the right person, can in fact, bring the happy.

But if you want to kayak through Hawaii on a whim, or back pack through foreign countries on a moments notice, it might be easier if you're single and carefree. Actually, you don't have to be single per se, backpacking through Europe with a partner that you like or love would be awesome. But if you have kids and a mortgage, I'm not saying it's not attainable, but a little tougher to work out the details.

If you don't want kids, that is okay. You don't have to be apologetic for this decision. I actually applaud it, because I would rather someone speak the truth and then live it, instead of doing what they think that everyone else thinks they should do. Just because you don't have kids, and aren't married, in no way means that you are not a responsible person. Holding a job and living on your own and paying your bills speaks to this.

So back to the beginning. To thine own self be true.

And who knows, five years from now when you're married and have three kids, you'll think back to this discussion and marvel at the thought of it.

See what I did there? Ha! I kid.

Live life out loud! (I think you already are)

See you soon friend,
Tiffany

PS This also means that you can eat food for breakfast that isn't considered breakfast food. Break the rules! What rules? There aren't any rules, are there?

4 comments:

cstinson said...

Applause.. We must always beat to our own drum. By the way driving through central TX on a whim is great too =)

Tiffany said...

Why yes, it is! Thanks for commenting my friend =)

Serenity said...

Well, I don't know how it's possible, but I hadn't read this post before my own post today. And yet it even has the same word in the title. We're just connected at the soul, that's all.

Having babies was monumentally, life-changingly wonderful for me - you know this. And yet, a hearty hear-hear. (Here, here?) There are so many things/people/ideas already on earth that need tending. Maybe those who don't want kids of their own are meant for one of these. :)

Tiffany said...

If ever there was an example of how to do the having-kids thing in the most outrageously awesome way, I would direct the people to stage-right, Bohon fam. that way -----> to the place where one learns how, if it IS for them, fabulous it can really be. =)