Saturday, August 7, 2010
The more things change, the more they stay the same......
I don't like change. I've discussed this with you before. I'm getting a lot better with the idea behind change though. It usually brings 'better'. I enjoy running into an old friend, or hearing from one with a phone call, and hearing in their voice, that even though circumstances in their lives may have changed since we last spoke, they are still the same person. I depend on that I guess. If you were awesome then, please be awesome now......is what I'm wishing for.
I've reconnected with a few friends in social media that have known me forever. I always love hearing that I'm exactly the same. It's not so much when they say "you look exactly the same!" (although that is really nice to hear) but when they say, "your smile lights up the room just like it always did", or "you make me laugh until my stomach hurts just like you always have". I sit back and think, see? Some things not changing are a very good thing.
One good thing that change can bring is personal growth. When I observe someone growing into themselves, becoming comfortable in their own skin, and saying mature things, making mature decisions, I smile like you wouldn't believe. It's a "feelgood" for sure, for me, and quite possibly why I'm attempting to do some of these things as well.
When someone isn't comfortable in their own skin, it makes me uncomfortable. Likewise, those around them. I feel bad for them, and often think, what can I do to help. Can I talk them into loving themselves in some way? Of course I can't. But I can talk to them, and listen. The listen is more important than the talking. I call true friendship "free therapy", and I'm extremely grateful for my free therapists.
My mom told me once that I couldn't save the world. She didn't mean it in a bad way, she said that because she cares about me. She sees me, at times, taking some things on that may become cumbersome in the long run, and she wants me to be happy. Light. Not carrying too much of a heavy load. It's that whole "weight of the world on your shoulders" idea. No one wants to see someone they care about carrying a heavy load, it's tiring.
I've given advice before where I've explained that what my friend is telling me about, is a "monkey on their back" and it's best to let it go. I'm a firm believer in this.
One of my favorite children's book illustrators (and graphic artists) is Mary Engelbreit. I love her whimsical view of the world and how she expresses herself through her drawings combined with her words. Here is how she views change:
~ If you don't like something change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it. ~ Mary Engelbreit
Can I get an amen?
So, I'm still on that archeological dig through my soul. I'm finding all kinds of things in there. Some I am keeping, others are being discarded. Maybe I should have a garage sale!
Meet me for breakfast tomorrow, Mimi's Cafe has the best mimosas. It's still Breakfast at Tiffanys if I'm with you. Plus I need help in getting a game plan in place for saving the world. Mom, I really can.