I've always believed in the balance of life....

"'Cause it's a bittersweet symphony, this life...."


One of my favorite songs, "Bittersweet Symphony" - The Verve, is in the background of my day, and sort of my life actually. Right now anyway.
 
I've always believed in the balance of life. There will be good days, and there will be not so good days. I embrace the good days so tight I squeeze the life right out of them. They far outnumber any bad days I might have, because, as you know, for the most part I rarely have a bad day.
 
A very dear friend was recently diagonosed with Non Hodgkins Lymphoma. Nothing like a reality check like that to have life come to a screeching halt for a moment. Cancer of any kind, at any age, is no fun obviously. He's only thirty-five years old, but he told me, "I will beat this".
 
So I wake up and go about my day. I hear, and see, parents screaming at their kids in public places. I see people cutting other people off in traffic. I hear people complaining at work about mundane things that really, in the end, have very little meaning. It makes me tired and sad in a way, to see a much bigger picture out there, that often goes unnoticed by others who forget to realize how lucky they are. I include myself in that statement too, I'm human.
 
"Here comes the sun"....comes on next, as I type this. And that is where I live, mostly. Constantly flipping the coin over to find the brighter side.
 
So yes, BP, you will beat this. If I didn't have faith in this statement I wouldn't say it. I've seen cancer get kicked to the curb so many times, this one will be no different.
 
My request for you, my friends, is this:
 
Be happy. If you're not, change things until you are. Read good books, and walk the dog, and eat a snowcone every time you want to. Be grateful for pretty things, like a gorgeous sunset or a lake with ducks swimming across the top of the water. Be kind. Call your friends and tell them you care about them. Make plans soon, especially if you haven't seen them for a while. Go to a concert and ROCK.OUT. Buy a plane ticket to a beach, and dig your toes in the sand. Write a book. (this is for my friend Kate who did just that, I can't wait to promote it when I get back in Facebook and Twitter).
 
And I wasn't kidding about the snowcone.
 
See you soon friend,
Tiffany
 
PS Severe Storms are on the horizon for North Texas tonight and tomorrow. If we have to eat Breakfast at Tiffanys by candlelight, I certainly won't mind. Will you?

"It takes a pair to beat the odds" In Review: 50/50

Although the Doctor continued to talk, all the while never looking directly into Adam's (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) eyes, the scene blurred at one word. Cancer.
I felt it. I knew right then, that I would react the same way. Not hear another thing that was said, after "you have cancer".
Eventually Adam comes to, at least enough to begin I asking questions. "ME? This doesn't make any sense! I don't smoke, I don't drink......I RECYCLE" When that last part was uttered I laughed and thought, so this is how they've done it. They've pulled off a movie where someone is told they have cancer, and still make me laugh while the story unfolds.

Now you know me. I'm not going to ruin this movie for you. When I feel compelled to write about a book I've read or a movie I've watched, I want to talk about it but not make you feel like you don't have to read/see it anymore because I gave away all of the secrets.

Seth Rogan, I love ya but I don't go see a movie just because you're in it. I apologize if this sounds rude, it's not meant to be. I'm explaining this because I want people to know that this is not one of your usual "comedy" movies. Yes, there are some really funny lines, and scenes in this one. But it's not overdone, which made it brilliant in small ways. I wasn't sure how in the world a movie like this, about someone learning they have cancer, could be considered a comedy. But trust me, when it's time to have those serious moments, it delivers beautifully. And quite frankly, even with your quirks, (okay, your character, Kyle's quirks) I think I would want you in my corner if this were to ever happen to me. Actually, I know I would.

A very strong theme came to mind somewhere in the middle of this story, so much so that I couldn't ignore it and will mention it now. Adam doesn't drive, he doesn't have a drivers license. And why? "because you can get killed in a car accident and and and......" (not a direct quote, but same meaning).

Cancer can kill too. Is there some irony to this? I think he thought so. I did too. It was rather insightful as the human side of him showed more clearly after the diagnosis. I learned, at least for him, what not to say to someone that is going through this.

I must mention that Bryce Dallas Howard is an excellent actress. If I'm supposed to dislike her character's (Rachael) actions, she proved me right again. Notice that I didn't say I disliked her character. I think she just didn't know what to do or say.

I know people that have fought this disease and won. I wondered if certain parts of the movie would make them relive scenes from their own journey that they wouldn't want to relive. At the end, I decided that I think they should try. It's a touching, heartfelt story laced with hilarity, a few curse words, adult content, parental relationships, loss.....and views from the other side of the coin.

"It takes a pair to beat the odds" ....a tagline for this movie.

Having many friends in your life is great. Having one truly wonderful, "I will always be there" friend, is the best.

See it. Let me know what you think!

Tiffany

PS Anna Kendrick plays Katherine, Adam's therapist, so well that I wanted to sit on the couch in her office and talk to her about nothing and everything. And I don't think that Katherine was confident that she was doing any good is what's interesting. Have I hooked you yet?

That dreaded word we all hate. The C word.

Breakfast at Tiffany's

I don't know if I have an irrational fear of getting cancer, I don't think I do, but when one of my dearest friends is diagnosed with the devil disease, it rocks my world as though it were me hearing the three words we don't ever want to hear; "you have cancer".

You know that feeling of your legs buckling out from underneath you? The oxygen being removed from your lungs? That's how I felt when I heard the news. Anger, immediate anger. WHY HER? It's not fair, and I pulled out my virtual list of why its not fair. This is not supposed to happen to her. But it's not supposed to happen to ANYone for that matter. I was absolutely amazed and instantly grateful at her take on this diagnosis. Humor intact, and providing the facts with ease, she updated our group of friends the best way she could, giving it to us straight, and all at once. I thank her for that. Living in different states she could have chosen to go through this without sharing and we may never have known. I am so glad she did not choose that, but instead, chose to let us in her private world that I am sure was rocked to the core.

In keeping with my idea of a "dia"blog I am sharing a bit of conversation I had with her today.

Me: I'm learning so much about this that I didnt know. I wish I was learning it from a freakin magazine instead of through you, but you are going to get through this. I would GIVE MY LEFT LEG if I lived there so I could help you. You know, sit there while you cuss at me, be the target . I'm a good target.

Friend: You know, right now I'm not feeling like that. EVERYONE has been so supportive.....it makes me get weepy when I think about all the people that really do care about me. I can be such a b**ch at times, but when the crap goes down, everyone is standing right beside me. I'm very lucky!!

I got tears when I read that alone. This friend considers herself lucky. She has cancer folks.

Me: dude I get it, it's easy to forget that peeps care and love, but I'm not going to let you forget, because I ADORE YOU. And I always will.

Friend: Everytime I talk about people supporting me, I really do start to cry. My mom's friend (who I have never met) made me a little knit hat. I'm writing her a thank you note and sobbing. I think it's just a lot of emotional stress and I'm not venting it enough or in the right direction or something.

Me: I totally get it. Every day I always ask myself what I would be feeling if I were going through this, I'm telling you, this sh** has effed my mind a little. When you told me about it, I was so MAD, I kept saying this is not supposed to happen TO HER. Its not supposed to happen to anyone, but I'm sayin. and then I've walked myself through what I would feel like, and quite frankly, I still think I dont know. I will say this, you're handling it beautifully, and if you have to cry, for godsake cry. Let.it.out. It's cleansing, then your insides are cleaner. (I admitted I was on caffeine overload at this point, but I too, turn to humor, always)

Friend: LOL...I like that...cry your cancer away. My new self help book. You can help me write it.

Me: omg THATS IT. What are we going to wear when Matt Lauer interviews us on the today show?

My message today is this: Be grateful. Choose to live. Fight for whatever is necessary to do so. And yes......if my friend and I are right, cry that damn cancer away.

Croissants were delish mon ami, thanks for having me.

Until then,
Tiffany